If you're a mother in recovery, you may have already run into the heartbreaking version of this question: Do I have to leave my kids to get well? For too many women, the fear of that answer is exactly what keeps them from reaching out at all. So let's be honest and clear.
The honest answer
Most sober living homes do not allow children. They're set up for individual adults, with shared rooms and schedules that don't make room for a family. But a small number of homes, including ours, are built specifically for women and their children, so a mother can keep her family together while she heals.
Why so few homes welcome kids
It's not that other homes don't care. Housing children takes more space, more thought, and a real commitment to safety and structure for little ones as well as their moms. It's harder to do well, so fewer homes take it on. That's exactly why the ones that do exist matter so much.
Why keeping your family together helps recovery
Separation isn't a motivator, it's a wound. When a mother doesn't have to choose between her recovery and her children, she can focus on getting well instead of aching over who's caring for her kids. Staying connected to your children, and staying a present parent, can be one of the strongest reasons to keep going.
What to look for in a home that welcomes children
- A genuinely safe space for kids, not just permission for them to be there.
- Other mothers in the same season, so you're understood, not judged.
- Realistic structure that respects both recovery and parenting, curfews, meetings, and daily rhythm that a mom can actually keep.
- Support around the practical things, like getting to meetings, school, work, and appointments.
- A women-only environment, which many mothers find safer and more honest.
How Roots & Wings does it
Roots & Wings Recovery Residence in Murrieta was built for exactly this, women and their children, together. We believe recovery should never mean leaving your kids behind. It's a safe, structured, substance-free home where mothers can heal while staying the parent their children need.
If that's the home you've been hoping exists, it does. We open October 1, and we're taking our waitlist now.